OK, that is NOT small stuff.
About fifteen years ago psychologist Richard Carlson published a teeny little book called “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff. And It’s All Small Stuff.” It was a sensational success, comprised of teeny little chapters featuring snippets of wisdom that could help anyone navigate the perilous journey through life. I’m not sure I subscribe completely to his thesis (global climate change, for instance, strikes me as BIG STUFF), but I think he’s got a lot to offer anyone going through the potentially stressful process of getting married. Here’s a list of ten chapter titles that show he really could have been writing about weddings. Slow down, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride.
- Make peace with imperfection. It won’t be perfect. Nothing ever has been, so embrace the reality and roll with it.
- Ask yourself the question: “Will this matter a year from now?” The mishaps and screwups will likely make for great stories, not for heartbreak.
- Repeat to yourself: “Life isn’t an emergency”. I’ve seen flowers delivered to the wrong address, marinara sauce spilled on a wedding gown, and a limousine’s water pump explode. Everyone got married, and laughed about all of it before the night was over.
- Choose your battles wisely. You can’t win them all, so try to minimize the disagreements.
- Turn your melodrama into a Mellow Drama. It’s the human comedy after all. You’ll get married, and everyone will have a good time.
- Be flexible with changes in your plans. If it ends up being ninety percent of what you wanted rather than that elusive perfection, is that so bad?
- Think of what you have instead of what you want. What you have is the love of the person who will be your partner for the rest of your lives. What more could you want?
- Cut yourself some slack. Your happiness is the most important component of the wedding, so be the first one to make yourself feel good about it.
- Give up on the idea: “More is better.” It’s not a competition. No one is comparing your wedding to anyone else’s. If they do, they don’t belong there.
- Keep asking yourself: “What’s really important?” Every time there’s a decision to be made or a potential issue to be resolved, take another of those deep breaths and remember to keep it all in perspective.
I’m not for a minute implying that your wedding doesn’t matter on the grand scale. Of course it does; it’s one of the most important days of your life. But I’ve been to a few hundred of them, and I’ve never seen one that didn’t have a happy ending.
Let us know if you have a few thoughts and phrases that helped you keep it all cool.
Much more fun without the T Rex.
My Pinterest and Facebook are always stress free!
